[Current iPod Track : John Legend - Save Room]
hebat. sudah lama sekali gue ngga ngerasa kayak gini. memang, kejadian2 belum lama ini membuat kata2 "nothing can ruin my good mood for the rest of 2006" selalu menempel di status yahoo messeger gue. (temen2 ym gw pasti tahu lah..) maklum, lagi diserang badai. gue ngga tahu istiah atau namanya apa, tapi yang pasti bukan adrenalin. karena yang satu ini bikin seneng, bukan bikin jantungan. seperti tabrakan beruntun yang menghantam gue dari semua arah. mungkin triggernya adalah ipod gue. lalu temen2 gue. kemudian kerjaan gue. dan yang terakhir, sepertinya gue lagi suka sama seseorang. asli ini senengnya ngga ketulungan. belum beberapa lama ini juga sebenernya gue sempet suka sama seseorang yang lain. and i thought i've done everything i could, just to show myself. cuma mungkin karena respon yang kurang sesuai dengan harapan, jadi sepertinya ngga terlalu work well. dan gue putuskan untuk mundur aja. kalo kata John Legend, "don't be afraid of a little bit of pain, pleasure is on the other side." i'm sure you know who you are. so if you happen to read this, i'm so sorry that i haven't got the chance to talk to you, about this. maybe later when you're not so busy.. or maybe cos right now i'm still trying to find what words to say. it hurts so much that i don't even know how to start a conversation with you. sorry, i need to fix this broken heart and i just want to move on. ok enough with this stuff, bukan ini kok intinya..
[Current iPod Track : Omarion - O]
entah kenapa di suatu malam di ujung duabelas, gue sempet terserang sesuatu yang beda. perasaan ini bukan seperti tabrakan beruntun yang gue ceritain tadi. tetep, datangnya dari semua arah, tapi ini dada gue serasa ditusuk2. dan bayangan tentang dia ngga bisa gue singkirkan sedikitpun. bahkan ngumpul sama temen2 gue pun ngga cukup mengobati sakit dan sesak di dada. sempet beberapa saat juga hampir air mata gue netes tanpa sebab yang jelas. but this is not something that can ruin my mood, i seem to enjoy being in this state. walaupun akhirnya gue meneteskan air mata juga, karena ngga tahan nahan nyeri di dada. tiba2 gue teringat sesuatu. pertama kali gue ngerasa kayak gini.. i knew it. i remember this feeling. i'm missing someone out there. i know i just met her, like.. twice? and the best part (i'm being ironic..) dari perasaan ini adalah : gue ngga bisa bilang ke orangnya kalo gue kangen sama dia. this heart is crying to say "i miss you" but it can't. well, belom mungkin. it's still too early. yah.. tapi namanya perasaan masa bisa bohong sih? ok, gue emang baru aja memutuskan buat mundur dari seseorang. dan ngga lama kemudian gue udah suka sama orang lain. well, mungkin emang gue orangnya begitu. sakit sih sakit, banget. tapi lagi2 gue selalu berpegang ke omongan salah satu temen gue "if it doesn't kill you, then it'll only make you stronger." then again, it works. mungkin gue memang orangnya cepet melupakan segala macem sakit hati. mungkin gue emang gampang suka sama orang. tapi gue juga sebenernya ngga pernah bisa deketin 2 orang dalam waktu yang bersamaan. kalo satu ya satu aja. kalo ngga work well ya sudah, mau apa lagi? cari yang lain lah..
[Current iPod Track : Jason Mraz - 1000 Things]
i know, i'm not that good at approaching someone. cos i'm me. like i said to one of my friends, i'm just trying to be myself. isn't that's what honesty means? if i change the way i talk, just to please someone, wouldn't i be lying to that person? wouldn't i be lying to myself? it's just not the real me, and i just don't like it. i guess i just want other people to notice me as who i really am. tell me, is it so hard just to notice someone's good intention? all i need, all i want was a chance to show you who i really am. you don't have to be a great talker, i just need a good listener. you don't have to be a great lover, i just need someone who can accept me just the way i am. cos nobody's "perfect" and i'm way too far from "perfect". but i can love you in a way that you've never imagined before. so please, notice me. i'll be waiting.
[Bondan, 28 Desember 2006, 12:36 PM, save room for my love, save a little..]
hebat. sudah lama sekali gue ngga ngerasa kayak gini. memang, kejadian2 belum lama ini membuat kata2 "nothing can ruin my good mood for the rest of 2006" selalu menempel di status yahoo messeger gue. (temen2 ym gw pasti tahu lah..) maklum, lagi diserang badai. gue ngga tahu istiah atau namanya apa, tapi yang pasti bukan adrenalin. karena yang satu ini bikin seneng, bukan bikin jantungan. seperti tabrakan beruntun yang menghantam gue dari semua arah. mungkin triggernya adalah ipod gue. lalu temen2 gue. kemudian kerjaan gue. dan yang terakhir, sepertinya gue lagi suka sama seseorang. asli ini senengnya ngga ketulungan. belum beberapa lama ini juga sebenernya gue sempet suka sama seseorang yang lain. and i thought i've done everything i could, just to show myself. cuma mungkin karena respon yang kurang sesuai dengan harapan, jadi sepertinya ngga terlalu work well. dan gue putuskan untuk mundur aja. kalo kata John Legend, "don't be afraid of a little bit of pain, pleasure is on the other side." i'm sure you know who you are. so if you happen to read this, i'm so sorry that i haven't got the chance to talk to you, about this. maybe later when you're not so busy.. or maybe cos right now i'm still trying to find what words to say. it hurts so much that i don't even know how to start a conversation with you. sorry, i need to fix this broken heart and i just want to move on. ok enough with this stuff, bukan ini kok intinya..
[Current iPod Track : Omarion - O]
entah kenapa di suatu malam di ujung duabelas, gue sempet terserang sesuatu yang beda. perasaan ini bukan seperti tabrakan beruntun yang gue ceritain tadi. tetep, datangnya dari semua arah, tapi ini dada gue serasa ditusuk2. dan bayangan tentang dia ngga bisa gue singkirkan sedikitpun. bahkan ngumpul sama temen2 gue pun ngga cukup mengobati sakit dan sesak di dada. sempet beberapa saat juga hampir air mata gue netes tanpa sebab yang jelas. but this is not something that can ruin my mood, i seem to enjoy being in this state. walaupun akhirnya gue meneteskan air mata juga, karena ngga tahan nahan nyeri di dada. tiba2 gue teringat sesuatu. pertama kali gue ngerasa kayak gini.. i knew it. i remember this feeling. i'm missing someone out there. i know i just met her, like.. twice? and the best part (i'm being ironic..) dari perasaan ini adalah : gue ngga bisa bilang ke orangnya kalo gue kangen sama dia. this heart is crying to say "i miss you" but it can't. well, belom mungkin. it's still too early. yah.. tapi namanya perasaan masa bisa bohong sih? ok, gue emang baru aja memutuskan buat mundur dari seseorang. dan ngga lama kemudian gue udah suka sama orang lain. well, mungkin emang gue orangnya begitu. sakit sih sakit, banget. tapi lagi2 gue selalu berpegang ke omongan salah satu temen gue "if it doesn't kill you, then it'll only make you stronger." then again, it works. mungkin gue memang orangnya cepet melupakan segala macem sakit hati. mungkin gue emang gampang suka sama orang. tapi gue juga sebenernya ngga pernah bisa deketin 2 orang dalam waktu yang bersamaan. kalo satu ya satu aja. kalo ngga work well ya sudah, mau apa lagi? cari yang lain lah..
[Current iPod Track : Jason Mraz - 1000 Things]
i know, i'm not that good at approaching someone. cos i'm me. like i said to one of my friends, i'm just trying to be myself. isn't that's what honesty means? if i change the way i talk, just to please someone, wouldn't i be lying to that person? wouldn't i be lying to myself? it's just not the real me, and i just don't like it. i guess i just want other people to notice me as who i really am. tell me, is it so hard just to notice someone's good intention? all i need, all i want was a chance to show you who i really am. you don't have to be a great talker, i just need a good listener. you don't have to be a great lover, i just need someone who can accept me just the way i am. cos nobody's "perfect" and i'm way too far from "perfect". but i can love you in a way that you've never imagined before. so please, notice me. i'll be waiting.
[Bondan, 28 Desember 2006, 12:36 PM, save room for my love, save a little..]
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